Originally posted on https://www.news9.com/story/40992344/what-to-expect-on-a-first-date-insight-and-tips
The first date can bring forth plenty of emotions – feeling nervous, excited, and a general curiosity about what the date will bring. Will you like the person? Will this be a waste of time? Are you wearing the right clothes?
You never know what to expect on a first date, but there are ways to make it a little more comfortable for both people. Read these first date tips below to ensure your date is not a dud.
There are no hard-core first-date rules, but going into a first date without any idea of what to say or do is nerve-wreaking. Follow these nine tips, and maybe that first date will turn into more.
The best way to find the right person is by being yourself and vice versa. You want the person to like you for you. That doesn’t mean you have to air all your dirty laundry (there are boundaries!), but share your likes, dislikes, and opinions in a kind and thoughtful way.
Putting up a facade on a first date only lays the groundwork for the other person to form a different idea of who you are. Be true to yourself, and you won’t have to work on keeping up an image.
Learning about someone takes work, so stay curious about the other person to keep the conversation going. Ask questions about their work, past, or try to find things you have in common with each other. If you lack some commonalities, ask questions to show that you’re interested.
Making small talk is excellent for an icebreaker, but at some point, the conversation will need to shift to a deeper level.
Everyone likes to talk about themselves, but there comes a time when listening to the other person is essential. On a first date, you’re getting to know someone, and that’s hard to do if you’re not listening or having an internal dialogue with yourself. When on a date, make eye contact, put your phone away, lean in, and give them your full attention.
While bars or concerts can provide a good time for all, the best place to be on a first date is someplace quiet. A quaint coffee shop or walk in the park would be an excellent location as you get to know your date better. Save the louder dates for when you have a better grasp of the individual.
Make sure the location you choose is comfortable for you both. If you hate going to bars, for example, speak up and suggest someplace else.
Instead of giving your date the run-down itinerary of yourself, tell them stories. Stories from your past are more interesting and intriguing, and the insight you provide can help your date know more about you.
It’s probably best not to bring up past dates or relationships because 49% of people don’t want to hear it. This is a new relationship, and the focus should be on each other, not on what happened during previous relationships. Your date might not enjoy hearing about it or might feel obligated to share their relationship horror stories when it makes them uncomfortable.
A serious date is no fun, so keep it light-hearted and fun. Don’t be afraid to share your sense of humor with your date. You might be surprised to find out you share the same type of humor!
If you do find yourselves drinking, don’t go overboard and certainly don’t get drunk. For one, drinks are pricey, and you don’t want to risk making a fool of yourself on a first date! It’s best to stay focused on your partner, especially if it’s going well.
Once upon a time, men front the bill on a date. Nowadays, women are more financially independent and, sometimes, they’re the initiator of the date. Splitting the check is socially appropriate, discuss it ahead of time.
The general rule of thumb now is that the person who asked the other person out pay the bill. However, if the guy is set on paying, let him do it!
The purpose of a first date is to get to know the other person better. It differs widely from a wedding proposal. Forgo all the bells and whistles and opt for a more low-key, casual date when the two of you can engage in conversation with each other while forming a relationship.
This should come without saying, but have fun! Too much pressure can extinguish a first date or a relationship before it’s had time to grow. Be open-minded, honest, and not hard!
It’s worth mentioning that if it’s not the right time for you to be dating, for whatever reason, you can decline the invitation until your more comfortable or ready. Or if you don’t feel like dating, that’s ok too.
Now that you know what to expect on a first date, you can relax and enjoy yourself! Take off the pressure and focus on the person, your needs, and if you want that first date to turn into a second. You’ve got this!
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